Am I My Sister's Keeper?

By Arian Nicole Muhammad

I want to start off by saying that I’m no expert on friendship but I know there’s indescribable joy when you have a good friend. And there is an equal if not greater joy in being a good friend.. So with that, I think that a true sister is a good friend. But now the question would be what is friendship? Well the dictionary describes a friend as:
1. A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
2. A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
3. A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.

Now to me this definition doesn’t tap deep enough into what it means to be a friend because every acquaintance isn’t a ‘friend’, and you don’t even have to like a person in order for them to be a good friend to you but what sticks out to me the most about the given definition is, a person who one knows “and” trusts coupled with the following, “a person with whom one is in an allied struggle or cause.” In a world full of animosity and distrust it is pertinent to be able to reach out take advantage of the wonderfully constructed presence of kinships… (relationships). In a world engulfed in flames of war, gossip, slander, and treachery it is ever apparent that our fight is not only a fight for our sanity but our fight is a fight for love. But can you love a person that you do not know?

I would say it is hard… but possible. Possible, because you can always get to know them. Smile. But I believe that your best friend first, is God because he knows you more than any other and you can put your absolute trust in him but next.. after the person you unite with under God, and your children, (which a mother and father should always be the best friend of their child in proper context) it is essential to be good friends with and of your sisters and brothers who are allied with you in the struggle. As sisters, we are allied first in our make-up and creation by God but also ironically in the evident struggle rooted in the misunderstanding of our creation and purpose as well. Yes we exist as individuals but to understand and know one woman starting with yourself is the gateway to knowing who your sister is.

The ability to relate to other beings intellectually, spiritually, and biologically is a fascinating gift and reality from our creator but not only are gifts oft-times taken for granted but people are. This writing is about not taking a good friend but more so a sister for granted. We have to learn that we are allied in a struggle.. a struggle for the recollection of our self-image and identity, a struggle of not knowing our value and purpose, and one of projecting ourselves in ways that foster pain, offense and mistrust amongst one another. In order to heal and truly be our sister’s keeper we have to get acquainted with self and our creator which will allow us to recognize that we are all divine, beautiful, and unique like vast varieties and shades of different flowers, growing under one sun. With that thought, we will begin to see that yes, though men sharpen men like steel sharpens steel.. as sisters, we are reflections of one another’s beauty. With that mindset and view you wouldn’t dare allow any weeds, whether they be the weeds of misunderstanding, miscommunication, or painful past experience to intervene and rob you of the presence of a beautiful friend. I prefer to be my sister's "keeper"http://www.changeworkshops.org/4273.html


Are You Your Sister's Keeper
 

By Sis. Connie Muhammad aka Nutmeg Singer/Songwriter

The question "are you your sisters keeper" begs for examination and is a subject that evokes emotion and feelings of what we experience as sisters, as women in society colored with a certain perception of how woman should relate to each other, and how we quantify the importance of that intimate relationship between sisters.
I am a member of the Nation of Islam, under the leadership of Minister Farrakhan. The ideas and basic beliefs and teachings of The Hon.Elijah Muhammad were taught to me early in life and some of those beliefs can become second nature. One of those basic beliefs some struggle with is that black people and people of the original family are by nature brothers and sisters.
Let us be clear on what defines "sister".
Websters Online Free Dictionary states:
sis·ter (sstr)
*n.*
*1. *A female having the same parents as another or one parent in common with another.
*2. *A girl or woman who shares a common ancestry, allegiance, character, or purpose with another or others, specifically:
*a. *A kinswoman.
*b. *A woman fellow member, as of a sorority.
*c. *A fellow woman.
*d. *A close woman friend or companion.
*e. *A fellow African-American woman or girl.
*f. *A woman who advocates, fosters, or takes part in the feminist movement.
*3. **Informal* Used as a form of address for a woman or girl.
*4. **Abbr. **Sr.* *Ecclesiastical*
*a. *A member of a religious order of women; a nun.
Let us also be clear on the meaning of the noun "keeper".
keep·er (kpr)
*n.*
*1. *One that keeps, especially:
*a. *An attendant, a guard, or a warden.
*b. *One that has the charge or care of something: a lion keeper; the keeper of the budget.
Websters Online Free Dictionary
This is interesting and all inclusive when we are in close societies,
organizations , churches, mosques, and social circles where women are together and interacting.
The Most Hon.Elijah Muhammad taught us that based on our ancestry as black people stolen from Africa, we were now brothers in sisters (by blood) and in the literal since, genetically. He had members of the Nation of Islam to address each other first as Brother and Sister. Hence, you can see even today members names are proceeded by Bro. and Sis. This incorporates a sense of endearment and commonality that has even affected other cultures. Young, "hip" white men now call themselves "Bro" and there is no
doubt the term is shared by black and conscious communities all over the world.
* Are you your sisters keeper? *
In the word "keeper" is the root word "keep".
The definition of the word "keep";
*kept*\ˈkept\*keep·ing*
transitive verb
1*:* to take notice of by appropriate conduct *:*
fulfill<http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fulfill>:
as *a* *:* to be faithful to <*keep* a promise> *b* *:* to act fittingly in relation to <*keep* the Sabbath> *c* *:* to conform to in habits or conduct
<*keep* late hours> *d* *:* to stay in accord with (a beat) <*keep* time>
In order to answer the question there has to be a honest search into ones self as a woman and find that answer. The only answer I can give is "I strive to be!". In striving we can all make mistakes and not be up to par. However, not being excellent at something is a opportunity to become excellent!
Many woman find that the earliest and most difficult and trying
relationship starts with the relationship with another female is with their mothers. As young girls we strive to gain approval from our parents and guardians who are supposed to "keep" us and many times girls are disappointed by those needs not being met.Trust is also an issue as we all are designed to trust our mothers to do their best at protecting us and making sure our needs are met. All too often, this also leads to disappointment . That disappointment grows into insecurity that if left unchecked, determines how women affected interact, respond, and think about other woman. Also, how these woman interact, respond, and make choices in regards to the men in their lives. At some point, these psychological scars need acknowledgement and a healing has to take place for woman affected to live at the very highest spiritual level of love, love of self, and love for each other.

The Hon.Minister Farrakhan made a very controversial decision to have members of the Nation of Islam engage in Dianetics, a technical form of treatment for psychological ills. He has said that our collective past (even slavery) affects how we interact with each other and has to be addressed.
*"Want for your sister what you want for yourself"*
As black woman, we are faced with insurmountable odds in almost every endeavor. Racism, sexism, misogyny, abuse in various forms are prevalent. In America, we come from a hurtful past of brutality, trial, and betrayal. We tend to feel we encounter love less in our lives and therefore have trouble giving love. However, sisters have also been able to overcome those hurtful feelings and come together in efforts of healing,communion, thru faith in various forms of spirituality. We have come a long way!
I can say that one of the most positive relationships I have had with a sister is with my half-sister. We have overcome many trials together and still have that intrinsic love for each other. We can have our fights, some intense, and still call each other and converse and know we still have that love between us. I only want positive outcomes for her and her for me. When she has success, I feel like I share in that success because we are linked by the desire to see each other succeed. We have vested interests in each others success.
To get to the point when by instinct we can desire that relationship beyond blood relations or "besties" with our sisters in the community and truly work on it, is a goal that we can truly benefit from. Unity is our power and for a people becoming liberated for a common purpose, absolutely necessary. In "The benefit of unity" a song by the Hon.Minister Farrakhan, he beautifully explains how we can "rise again" thru unity with each other and without love there is no unity.
These are some of my reflections when asked "Are you your sisters keeper?" I can say in truth that I am striving to be.

The Divine Value of Women

By: Sis. Nina X

The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan, urges us, as women, to have a greater regard for ourselves and our divine nature. In doing this, we will help to produce the kingdom of God.

We as a people cannot be made new with out the repair of the women. Our beloved Minister wants us to focus on the importance of the woman, and why it is so essential for us to be strong, spiritually grounded and intelligent mothers.We, as the mothers of civilization have the ability to impress greatness and righteousness on our children before they are even born. The Minister wants us to fill our heads with knowledge.The more knowledge we have, the more we can see greatness for the children that we give birth to.

We must apply pressure on our minds about the power that we truly hold. For instance, the amount of stress that we carry can negatively affect our homes. Conversely, keeping spiritually focused stabilizes the mood which causes a peaceful affect of ones surroundings.

It is important to be a praying woman. We have played the martyr for too long. Martyrs to fatigue, short tempers and impatience. We and our families suffer because we are emotionally, physically and spiritually overdrawn. We are deprived of our true essence, which is Allah (God).

For physical sustenance, we have been blessed with the book, How To Eat To Live, authored by, The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad. Since we are divine creatures; the mothers of civilization, we must take special care in regard to what we eat and drink. Proper eating is a remedy to such ailments as mood swings, hay fever and even depression. The Honorable Minister Farrakhan teaches that "our wombs are a manifestation of the Creators self-creation and we must not simply offer ourselves to men because of fame, money or good looks". Also, it is important that we inspect our potential mates thoroughly.

In the Bible Proverbs 31:10 states "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies." We must be that virtuous woman (a woman of strength). We should be like a rare gem. Precious stones are termed precious because they are so rare. God made most common stones unattractive; yet He made most rare stones very beautiful, brilliant and lustrous.To be a virtuous woman is to be a beautiful woman, not necessarily outwardly, but certainly inwardly. Furthermore, to know our true value, which is to be the woman of God.
As the woman of God you will desire a man who would fight, kill and if necessary die to protect you!
The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad taught that we as women cannot be protected if our men can't control us. We may reject control from a man who is unworthy of our respect and honor; but, we will not mind being controlled if the man is controlled by God.

When a man is a good maintainer of a woman, we will not mind, a good brother exercising control, if we are virtuous. A man under the control of God is not going to be wicked in exercise of his authority, but he will be just and fair. When he hears truth coming from her, he will submit to that truth.

We are so valuable that Satan is using us, the black woman, to bring the black man down. The Minister states that "If Satan's desire is to create an adverse world, he has to deceive and beguile the women." We were created that man might find peace and quiet of mind in us. We are a comfort to him. Through deception in the media and a corrupt society, Satan has made mischief with the woman's natural powers to give consolation and solace to man. This wicked plan can be combated by coming into the knowledge of our value.
"A Nation Can Rise No Higher Than Its Woman," so sisters, love and appreciate yourself! Our true value is not our hair or nails or the shape of our bodies. Our value is our moral integrity and the beauty of God within.

Accept your own and be your self! And with the help of Allah (God), we will grow into the goddesses that we are designed to be.

We will raise our Nation!
May Allah Bless Us All With The Light Of Understanding...